For many, the introduction to life as a military spouse arrives with some of our most cherished photos: those of joyous weddings, heartfelt reunions, proud graduations and promotions. Rarely photographed are the hard realities: the long deployments and the aching absences, and the ways those things can wear on marriages and families — sometimes until they fray.
In this wide chasm between expectation and reality, Heather Sweeney’s new memoir “Camouflage” is a welcome addition to the military-spouse literary canon that often only celebrates the proud moments and obscures the others. Chronicling her earliest days of adapting to life as a military spouse to the marriage’s ultimate demise, Sweeney’s honesty in sharing her story will be a balm to the many spouses for whom life doesn’t look like the social media highlight reel.
One month after their destination wedding, Sweeney’s husband joined the military and their entire lives changed. As she adjusted to the role of military spouse and all the accompanying responsibilities, the cataclysmic events of 9/11 unfolded, changing the course of the country and his service forever. Against this backdrop, the marriage slowly fell apart.
Sweeney’s beautiful writing has long captivated readers — her work frequently appears in national publications like Good Housekeeping and TODAY — and her divorce itself was announced in The New York Times as part of their column “At War,” which documented the impact of America’s wars.
As her military marriage came to an end, Sweeney mourned the life they’d intended to build together, and instead, learned to build her own. Writing, an activity she turned to during a deployment, became a lifeline and an enormous part of her finding her own voice — and beginning to use it.
“Camouflage” is available everywhere books are sold. On Oct. 29 at 2 p.m. ET, Sweeney will be the guest for Military Families Magazine’s Book Chats with Kate Lewis on Instagram Live.
