It is no surprise that working parents report child care costs to be a source of financial stress. A new database, sponsored by the U.S. Department of Labor (DOL) Women’s Bureau, includes data for 47 states. Information shows prices range “between 8% and 19.3% of median family income per child in paid care.” The DOL says child care remains “out of reach” for parents, like Air Force Staff Sgt. select Tiffany Banks.
Banks is among 4% of active-duty military members who are single parents. That number is more than double for the reserve side, according to a 2022 demographics report by the Department of Defense.
Banks, a single mother of three, joined the Air Force at 29 after marrying and supporting the career of her now ex-husband. Banks says her greatest struggles as a single active-duty member are finding childcare and overcoming mom guilt.
“Even with the flexibility and support of my leadership, finding child care is an issue,” she said. “Although military child care is substantially lower than civilian child care, they factor in BAH. As a junior enlisted airman with three children, I simply cannot afford it.”
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While childcare costs vary by location, families with small children expect to pay anywhere from $5,357 and $17,171, according to DOL. Resources like Military OneSource and Operation Child Care Project can help military-affiliated parents find child care, but Banks explains affordability makes it a continuous struggle.
“I rely on the help of other single parents I know, my church family and neighbors for assistance. They have been a big help.” Banks added.
Lack of adequate child care directly impacts service member readiness, especially for single parents who can’t always rely on a partner for assistance. Frequent relocation, lack of support, financial struggles and irregular work schedules are some complications when seeking child care.
“ … Whereas civilians can rely on close friends or relatives, military families can end up at bases far away from their support network,” Banks said.
Banks acknowledges that it’s with the support of great leadership and a heavy dose of grit that she’s gotten to where she is today.
“I have been so blessed in my short career thus far to have had phenomenal leaders in my corner,” she explained.
However, she said an area she thinks needs improvement is the Commander’s Key Support Program. Formerly known as the Key Spouse Program, it offers programs, services and resources to active-duty members and their families. They host socials where spouses get together and form a support network. Banks expressed that single parents desperately need something like this, too.
As a single parent joining the military, she established her mindset immediately. Among the unknowns of the military, she focused on things she could control, like her attitude. Determined not to have her situation used against her, Banks set herself up for success by clinging to the right focus.
“I made up my mind that I would never allow [being a single parent] to be used against me,” she shared. “Instead, my work ethic speaks for itself. I don’t make excuses and take my job seriously. Because of this, when I do need to request time off or some flexibility with my work schedule if manning allows, my leadership usually obliges.”
When asked how being a single parent affects her career progression, Banks says it pushes her harder.
“If anything, being a single parent motivates me to go after this goal even harder since I am the only parent my children can depend on,” she said.
Visit https://www.occproject.org/ for childcare resources for military families.
